Relationship Counseling

Our Philosophy

Conflict is inevitable in any intimate relationship. However, if partners trust each other, even when they experience conflict, they can grow closer to one another through the process of repair.

In relationship counseling, we want to do more than "make peace." Rather, we endeavor to help clients build or strengthen a resilient bond that continues to nourish both individuals in the midst of conflict, resulting in feelings of stability and satisfaction.

“Perhaps counterintuitively, it helps to know that heartbreak is inevitable whether we're together for a few months or for the rest of our lives. The difference is whether we'll part ways to heal on our own or do it together.”
Esther Perel

We use Sue Johnson's Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy as the foundation of our work with couples. EFT is based on attachment theory which explains how our emotional and physiological responses are regulated by our closest relationships. When we feel secure in those relationships, we see greater resilience throughout our lives, but when those core relationships are threatened, we tend to react very intensely by lashing out or pulling away.

Unregulated couples often get thrown out of equilibrium and enter a feedback loop in which both partners' behavior becomes destructive to the relationship, sometimes in shocking ways. In EFT, the "client" that we focus on is the relationship, and the therapist works with both individuals to be heard and respected so that the relationship returns to a stable equilibrium.